A Visit to the Zoo

Being a Lancastrian, I enjoyed Stanley Holloway’s ‘Albert and the Lion’ as a child and so resolved to attempt a monologue of my own. I chose the name Albert Ramsbottom in tribute to that earlier story, and my own tale is, in a manner of speaking, a sequel to it.
A Visit to the Zoo is based upon a true story that was recounted to me in a pub many years ago, which must have lurked in the back of my mind ever since. Something similar actually happened but I have adapted it to suit the character of Albert, the ‘hero’ of the yarn. I am almost ashamed to confess that Albert is a re-construct of myself as a boy, whilst his mother is the product of observing the adversities of parenting suffered by my own three daughters.
My wife and I took our niece, Lucy, to London Zoo, where we, too, were allowed to feed penguins. I can vouch for their voracious appetites and their complete absence of manners, together with the ready use of their beaks, and believe that this harrowing experience constitutes true in-depth research into the workings of a penguin’s mind.
I wrote the story to entertain my grandchildren, but I doubt if they enjoyed the telling as much as I enjoyed the writing. I do hope it makes you smile when reading it to your audience or yourself.